PURGING MYSELF OF GUILT

Ok so it has happened. One of my nightmares have come true. Mr X has read this blog. I didnt want it to happen except perhaps in my some perverse mode (which comes rarely ok ).So this happened. His mistake entirely. His curiosity got better over him.Well what do they say about eavsdropping...u never hear anyone saying good things about you. Similarly u shd'nt be reading blogs u are not suppossed to.
So well he read it , felt I had painted him in a very negative light. Felt that anyone who reads it would think of him as a scoundrel ( well thats my english version. The word he used was "kamina").And that he himself started feeling guilty after reading it.
Well being typical me, I first fought that he had no right to read my personal blog( that's pretty rich I know coz everyone knows this is a public space ), then went over defending what I write is my concern theory, then felt guilty for putting him through this for no evident mistake of his (his own words these), then felt like deleting this entire thing off and lastly (the mood I'm presently in ) WTF my blog , my space , I'll write whatever I want. Dont want to hurt u intentionally, but dear if u get hurt then the least I can say is that I' m hurting too and much more than you for the past four years.
So for his own good he should stay away from this blog. He asked me why this blog focusses so much on him(something I dont really agree to...I mean I do write about other things..don't I) And what can I do when half of my life's focus is on him(something I want to change and fast ).
So I am purging myself of this guilt. Want to purge myself from him too. Just feel free from all these stupid emotions I feel for him.I think he will never understand how agonising it is to be chained in the love of a person who'll never love you back. So I too need liberation. Dream of a day when I wake free from the shackles of his love, a day I won't think about him even for once.